not exactly a news flash...

but paris hilton pisses me off. nothing new, really. and i'm pretty confident in saying that i'm not the only one. so, what has caused me to feel compelled to bitch and moan about something so obvious? we'll, she has a new craft line coming out this spring. and for some reason unknown to me, the only images they have released regarding this collection is this:

seriously? what does this tell me? i can say it doesnt tell me to buy/use this collection. entirely too pink. i like my bling these days, but i would much rather stick with stickles and/or kaiser craft's rhinestones... ok maybe some pearls too... but, back to the rant at hand, is the line so lame that they want to boost the hype around it? did paris hilton really have a niche to fill in the scrapbook industry? do you think they will some how try to include hair extentions in her crafting kits?  is it just me who sits here and ponders this kind of crap?

maybe. happy tuesday!

sunshine and bunnies, holly* 

open rant post.

ok. i have a rant, but i want everyone else feel like they can bitch and moan too. so, please, feel free to complain about everything and anything you want (guilt free) in the comments. go on, you know you want to.

MY RANT: ok, so i've been trying to stay off my laptop. i've been trying to get crap done. i've been mostly successful (posts to come) so today i thought i would catch up on some blogs with my morning coffee. the thing is, its going to be a two pot morning because i have over 400 updates on my reader. srsly? what the fuck are you people blogging about? no, i'm not serious. i'm glad that y'all are out there, sharing with everyone. i look forward to reading everything, but i just dont feel like all my reads will be getting the attention they deserve. hopefully this boom in posts is something i can adapt to or you people crawl back into your holes and get busy with other junk again!!! :)

my other rant: i hate effing outlook. somehow the boogerbear manages to make mine go all wonky with random button smashing when he's momentarily left alone in near vacinty of my laptop. i dont want to troubleshoot it right now, so i'm currently checking my email via my archived emails on the gmail server because outlook keeps pulling my emails off the server (i have it set to save a copy on the server JUST IN CASE) and hiding them somewhere in never, never outlook land. *sigh*

/end rant.

i demand a scotts valley target!!!

so almost a year ago the big box store target submited an application to build a target store a very short distance from my home. the town i live in is mostly small and quaint, but desperately in need of this additional modern convience. i know. we're supposed to be the hippy, crunchy type, but target isnt all that bad. its not as bad as kmart which we've had in town since the dawn of time. has anyone been in kmart lately? no, i didnt think so. mostly because a majority of the landlocked kmarts have been closed in the past decade and, oh yea, THEY BLOW! target, in their own huge corperation way, does their part to be "eco-friendly" and i think that should could a little for those tree-huggers out there.

the biggest opposition seems to be that it will increase the traffic to our area, but i dont hear anyone raise a big stink every summer when the "valleys" (aka. residents from san jose/bay area) herd themselves over our hill and reak havoc on our little towns yet bringing in those tourist dollars. effing tourist. but thats a whole other can of worms.

if the residents of scotts valley are going to worry about anything from this proposed store, then they should worry about the developers asking for tax breaks. what i mean by that is that this project being subsidized to build here. this is what is going to impact the "local" business negatively as target can typically offer lower prices than the local business and didnt even have to pay into the community to build but instead takes from the tax payers. i dont know that this is how target opperates. in fact, i have no reason to believe that this is a practice target partakes in. (its a walmart thing.) BUT, i'm also not seeing anything being documented about the circumstances of the target coming into our community.

regardless of that, lets say the target is built. i see myself going to target for things like trash bags and storage units and still going to Zinnia's for the cute little gift i need. so, what was that about local business? i know i'm not every resident, but i think that our family unit does represent a considerable chunk of the scotts valley demographic. i could be wrong. i havent done a lot of research on that. i just know where the (yes, the) sex offender lives.

what brings this up? well i need to go to target today. i have a list (giant blue storage containers, those suckers that make colds more bearable...) but i dont want to take the 30min-ish drive to get there. on the upside, the target in watsonville is next to super tacoria. its SUPER! so, veggie burritos for dinner tonight.

anyone have any experience of a big box store coming into a small town? am i completely wrong in my feelings about this? what came first, the chicken or the egg? please share.

another {mostly} hypothetical question.

if i bitch in a forest and no one is there to hear me, am i really bitching?

ok, more clearly, when you're exposed to someone complaining/bitching/moaning/being pussy do you offer help or just nod and smile? husband likes to whine and i like to provide possible solutions. but, then he gets all butt hurt when i try to help with his issues. isnt that what people want? answers to there "problems"? i guess some people dont. for those people i say suffer then. i'm going to solve my problem and move on with my life.

so, how was everyone's weekend?

a comment turned post.

So really, it’s not a big deal. I think the vagueness of the last post is making seem like I’m throwing a little pity party.

I was really asking people if THEY would say something to a "friend". I have already come to my own conclusions on this topic (I’m very good at making decisions), but my hand was sitting dangerously close to the "post" button when I was thinking this matter over. Sometimes thinking out loud can be scary. Shoot, for me, thinking quietly in the corner can be scary.

I think, while maybe aimed at me personally, Kelly makes the best point. A lot of times people don’t know another person's situation and they get their feelers hurt as a result. Perception plays a larger role in people's interpretations than we give it credit. So many times we've all seen something, sucked in our perception, and then drawn our own conclusions even before we have all the facts. Sometimes many actions are taken on those conclusions and cause a lot of damage. I guess it boils down to not thinking yourself the center of the universe and remember that everyone has their own junk going on outside of you no matter how super rad you {think you} are.

But, on the other hand, I wish a lot of people were more open/honest about their situations. Unfortunately a lot of people aren’t secure enough or too shamed to do that. Which is too bad in itself? As a society people are too quick to judge. I know I have been guilty of it (I call television personalities sluts way too often), but I really try not to judge a person, especially at face value. Going back to Kelly, I don’t know their situation, therefore, who the hell am I to judge.

But my thought process isn’t exactly main stream. I’ve been known to be a little too honest lately, a little too forward, but if that is how I feel, then that is what I’m going to say. I’ve told many lies in my lifetime and I’m ashamed of every single one. I’ve messed with people I hold very dearly to me (among you, lee&co)and I’m still getting around to really apologizing for some of the things I’ve done to these people. I learned a valuable life lesion the hard way and what I learned from all of this was that hiding/lying/omitting the truth just digs big, deep, slippery holes that take a long time to get out of, thus my open honestly policy. It’s not for everyone, but it’s how I choose to live my life. Occasionally people get hurt by my word vomit, but I think that sucks. Really, I do. If the truth hurts, then something needs to change the truth. Not a lie. But something real that makes the truth different, something a person wants to hear. (that almost makes sense) I have a hard time apologizing for the truth because of this. (so Kelly, no need to apologize for your personally thoughts/feelings on something. At least not with me. I like it rough...)

The whole point is, I have a habit for calling things like I seem them and I was just wondering what people would do if placed in a hypothetical situation. That’s all. Nice comment huh? Good thing its my blog and I can totally babble at you poor saps who feel obligated to read my junk. XO too all you poor saps…

you know what i hate?

Cell Phones. Yes. Cell Phones. Big time.

So, here's the deal. like a freak, i have two cell phones and they both are driving me effing NUTS!!!

cell phone A: my "local phone" took a swim in a pool of spilled coffee on monday. lame, but we got suckered into, i mean wisely purchased the cell phone replacement insurance. monday afternoon i sat down at my laptop for what i thought would be a very painful experience. to my surprise, it wasnt painful at all. it took about 10minutes and a brand-spankin new orange enV showed up at our door the very next morning!!! yay! i activated it and all was well with the exception that i lost ALL my contacts that i had on my coffee soaked phone. again, lame, but i could recover most of my contacts off cell phone B and the rest i could just ask for via email or the next time i saw the missing contact in person. so, today i FORCED myself to go to the verizon store and get those contacts i did have transferred onto the new phone. after an hour of waiting, explaining, having the representative completely not listen to me, re-explaining, having the representative get confused, looking at the manager standing next to her with sad puppy dog eyes, having them figure it out only to tell me they didnt have a replacement phone in stock, queue theboogerbear screaming like a banshee and i still walked out the store with out a phone. ok, what i did learn was that the insurance replacement phone was now covered under a 30day defect warrenty. the phone being clearly DEFECTIVE is covered. so, a NOT brand-spaking new REFERBISHED phone is on its way to my house. yay! someone else's earsweat on my phone. so, tomorrow i get to wait for the phone to show up (hopefully before gymboree), activate it and head back to the verizon store to try to get my contacts transferred. hooray....

cell phone B: my "texas phone" is just a lame duck. its freakin old as moses. its actually on my mom's at&t account. just an extra line that i seldomly use, but its good to have around so my grandma doesnt have to pay long distance charges when she calls me. yea, so i need to make some phone calls in the car, but i cant because my almost 3 year old razor cant handle keeping a call connected while moving at a 50mph pace. ARGH!!! RAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaGE!!!

oh well, my crop-a-dile showed up today, FINALLY. so i'm going to go punch holes in things and grommet until i puke.

have a good evening everyone!!!!

its been one heck of a day.

omg. today has to be one of the lamest days in a while. just to gripe and get some stuff off my chest, it started out by waking up after only getting 4hours of sleep (i know. boohoo. poor me.) i thought the world was going to be a better place when husband took the boogerbear upstairs and left me to rest. well, that is until my phone started ringing like 20minutes later (you got it, just enough tiime to get back to sleep. i have a hard time with that kind of stuff.) i missed the call, but the noise from the msg did get my attention. i listened to the msg. it was my FIL. my poor MIL was up all night puking and wasnt feeling so hot. my MIL planned a birthday celebration for me and since she was not feeling so hot, they just wanted to inform us that the day's plans had changed. (poop. but no big deal. i was worried about my MIL, but not stressing about any other events) so, i sent a text upstairs to husband. (thats how things work in this house. if i just yell at husband to return his step-dad's call, the boogerbear would obviously hear me and more than likely throw a huge shit fit until i went upstairs.) i waited a moment to hear husband stomping over to his cell phone to check his txt, but nothing. grr... oh well, no rush. i think to myself that i'm still a bit drowsy so i will get just a little more rest and then go up and tell husband and my SIL what the deal was and we'de go from there. ok. snuggle back into our medium warmth goose down supersized lacrosse comforter from the company store. (mmmmm....) just as my mind starts to drift back into a blissful state of unconsiousness, i hear goldfinger screaming their cover of "99 red balloons" at me. (i'm a big fan of the music ringtone on most days) argh! now, i cant find my phone. grr. so i miss the call again. its my MIL again. there's a message. i listen. the voice i hear is one of the saddest, most pathetic sounds i've ever heard. its my MIL. she's, yea, sick. i guess there was some confusion as to who was calling who and everyone just called me. ok, i send husband another txt. i wait for the stomping. nothing. queue baby crying here. arg! there is no way my tired butt is going back to sleep now. poop.

so i throw aside my beloved comforter and drag my feet as i head out of the bedroom and upstairs. i walk straight over to husband's phone. turn the ringer back ON and toss it to him, telling him he has a txt msg. anywho, the plans for the day are no more, so we kinda talk about what we're going to do. my super cool SIL steps in and says she'll baby sit while we go out tonight. (our plan was to go out tomorrow on my actual bday and the now sick MIL was going to baby sit.) sounds good. at this point i'm a little peeved at husband. in general, i try not to expect much from him in the take control and make my birthday a perfect day department. i try not to because i will unfortunately be sorely disappointed if i do expect a lot. lame, but its not who he is. he's a tell me what you want and i'll get it kinda guy. works out pretty good sometimes. so, i've thrown my share of over the top and/or suprise parties for other people in my life time, but i've never received one. i was NOT expecting anything, but, when a gal hits a quarter of a century, you'de think there would be a few balloons and noise makers. again, i did not expect this, but it would have been nice for husband to take the wheel and steer my bday into the right direction. he didnt. he got a flat tire. anywho, we have a baby sitter and a couple ideas of where we're planning on checking for reservations.

time for lunch. we get ready to head to a sammich place we both like. as i get into the car, my grandmother calls. ok. so she's way stressed over my mom who has been having a really rough time with her depression/grief issues. i have no idea what to tell her. i'm always treated like a kid in my family. that is, until everyone else falls apart and i'm supposed to be the rock. not allowed to loose it, but always relied on to be dumped on. its ok. i'm a good listener. i have my share of common sense to help with a problem when i can. i didnt have the patience for it today. i totally yelled at my poor grandmother who did nothing wrong other than worry about her baby girl. (yes, we're talking about a 50year old woman here, but its one of those "the things you do for your kids" thing) i just couldnt take being dumped on this time. (by dumped on i mean having people just spill their problems and not think twice about my life and its own basket of problems/issues) all week long i was dumped on. my mom had a really bad week. i have no idea where her feelings for my step-dad are coming from, but this week was his birthday (the 12th) and she was way down and mega sad over that. she hates her job and every kid that comes with it. (she has to be a little nutty, she's an 8th grade english teacher) then this was her 1st valentine's day sans husband. every holiday has a special memory once you spend a few years with a certain person. had my parents just divorced, the holidays would be different and possibly a little hard to get used to. BUT, again back to the unknown feelings for my step-dad, each holiday seems to be really taking its toll thanks to him removing himself in a very permanent way. the reason why i dont understand her "grief" is because i have such a cold view point of the situation. sometimes i just want to take my mom by the sholders, give her a good shake and say "look! he's out of your life! you wanted him out! you left him! it sucks that he took the steps to remove himself from not only your life, but this world as well. BUT THAT WAS HIS DOING!!!" i have a really hard time not asking my mom if she would be with him again if he were alive. her mourning never remembers the bad times. the last five or so years where she was so miserable. or maybe she didnt need to divorce him at all? maybe he wasnt the source of her depression? maybe her depression comes from something else? her job? me? her? i dont know and i cant help. i apologized for exploding. we're at the sammich place.

we eat. lunch was good. we head back to the car and decided to go to a local market to snag a bottle of wine for dinner. on the way i get a call from the michael's manager that was handling my paper work. she tells me that my paperwork is a go, BUT she had just got back from corperate meetings and was told that Michael's would be putting their classes on hiatus until at least april 1st if not indefinately. arg! i knew wasnt HIRED, except that i was hired on the condition that i wasnt a child molester. well, on the up side, she offered me a spot as a cashier (ew! thanks, but no thanks!) and said she thought i would have made a fantastic instructor and will definately have my paperwork on top and give me a call if michaels decides to resume their classes. i thanked her. hung up. and cried.

husband was very sweet. held my hand. let me cry. i got over it. we went to the jewelry store than he got my valentine's gift from. (pearl earings to match the necklace i got last year for valentine's)things started looking up from there. the jewelry store had had coffee. i needed it. i walked up to the pearls counter and explained to the woman there the exchange i had in mind. she took my necklace and current studs to the back and with in 3minutes returned with a single pair of pearl studs. they were perfect. i wanted something smaller than what husband originally bought. he bought 8mm. i thought i might want 5mm. she brought 6.5mm and they looked great on my earlobe. PLUS, they were a perfect match to my necklace. awesome. she also cleaned my wedding ring. its all super shiney now. the exchange was handled with no snags. we returned to our domicile.

after a series of failed phone calls to possible locations for a babyfree meal, one of our favorite places had seating for this evening in an hour and a half. i got dressed. super SIL showed up. we headed back out the door. 3 hours, 1 before dinner drink, 1 bottle of wine, 2 soups, salads, filet mignon, rack of lamb, creme brulee, warm bread pudding, coffee, cappicino, and digestifs we returned home again to find a smeeping baby and happy auntie. apparently the evening went well for them as well. after such a crappy day, at least there was some peace found at the end of the day with an incrediable dinner OUT! i could have made better mashed potatoes, but it was OUT. no kids and no dishes. YAY! PLUS, i did open my bday giftie from my SIL. she got me season1 of ugly betty. we're watching it now.

so, at the end of the day i'm still unsure of my feelings about this birthday thing and then other people's involvement with it. will i get a birthday cake tomorrow? more than likely not. will i be upset about it? a little. will it really matter to me on tuesday? no. i think i do get where those "birthdays suck" people are coming from though....

sorry to be so poopie. but, hey, tomorrow is another day. HEY! its a whole other year of my life.

ok, one more rant. just a little one...

WHY DONT PEOPLE FREAKIN RSVP?!?!!?!? i mailed off those babies shower invitations like 2weeks ago and NOT A SINGLE PERSON HAS RSVP'd. talk about a pet peeve. i always RSVP no matter if i'm attending or not. isnt that the point? how am i supposed to plan/buy crap with out knowing how many bodies are there.

buttholes.